I've always been "chunky". Since having my baby in Feb 2010, I've become "jolly". I literally jiggle like a bowl full of jelly.
I am the least un-motivated person with the best of intentions. I have bought countless workout DVDs. I even have one that is still in the package. I do the video once, maybe twice before I forget that I own it. When working out to the DVD, I make sure that I am alone, and still then, I am utterly embarrassed. I am wildly uncoordinated. I literally come out with an injury every time I vacuum. It's like a full-body contact sport. If I ever played football, I'm sure that it would be fatal.
I like to walk, but I live in the sticks on a dirt road, with lots of wild life. I can't help but picture having to out-run a grizzly or a cougar (no joke) and pushing the stroller like a mad-woman. So, I fear the walk.
So, with exercise pretty much vetoed, all I have left is diet. I'm a snacker by nature. I eat small meals, but the snacking gets to me. I also looooooooove cheese. It's my kryptonite. Cheese goes straight to my ass and belly. I love veggies, but feel hungry 35 seconds after eating them.
So with healthy eating nearly impossible... I've decided that I should take up an eating disorder. I don't like to throw up, so I guess anorexia is the answer. I've always wished I had an eating disorder, but never had the motivation to stick to it. I've tried both as a teenager. When I was in college, I simply could not afford to eat, so I ate once a day. I had the most rockingest body ever! I want that back.
I think I'll take up mild anorexia. My morning Coca-cola, since I don't drink coffee. Then water until supper time, where I can eat whatever.
It's not healthy, but I don't care. I don't have the time, the money or the patience to do this the healthy way. I have a 40lbs goal. I will keep a journal. Weigh myself every morning. When the 40lbs goal is reached, I will return to normal, without the snacking.
Here's to ignoring food... mostly.
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