Parenting FAIL!

I am having a real hard time being responsible and being the parent right now.

Yesterday, I took E to get a haircut.  About 1/2 way through her haircut, the stylist stopped.  She and E rounded the corner -- E completely embarrassed and close to tears, the stylist giving me the most degrading stink eye.  The stylist informed me that E had lice... "like bad".  She showed me, and indeed, there was a large infestation.  I was utterly mortified.  I have no idea where she got it from!  But the look that stylist's face!  She looked at me like I was the lowest form of trash that crawled out of the trailer park to get my kid's "herrr did".

I immediately started panicking inside.  That musical movie montage from the movie "The Switch", where Jason Bateman has to delouse his son flashed through my mind.  I started praying for a musical movie montage instead of facing the weeks of crap ahead of me.  E thought it was a simple as taking a shower.  ::facepalm::

I went to the pharmacy and asked the lovely pharmacist to school me and to hook me up.  With $37.00 lice shampoo in hand, I drove home, calling M on the way.  By the time I got home with E, M had started putting E's things in garbage bags and was Googling how to get rid of these tiny fuckers.

So, here comes my fail.  I couldn't do the combing thing.  I had to call my MIL in to pinch hit.  She's dealt with it before.  I applied the shampoo and rinsed, but MIL had to re-rinse and pick.  She made me touch one, just so I knew how it felt on the hair.  She really had to convince me to touch it.  I nearly crapped myself, which did exactly instil any confidence in E.  I flipped after I left the bathroom.  I confided in M that I just couldn't do it.  I cannot pick.

I have about 16 years of laundry ahead of me, which I'm really not relishing.  The house has been vacuumed and cleaned top to bottom, and our main bathroom smells like an indoor pool, because M cleaned it "hospital clean" with bleach.

Here's some more parenting fail.  I cannot handle the stress that this is bringing on.  I had a stress-induced migraine all weekend long.  It keeps coming back every time my stress level skyrockets.  I just want to check out.  If the house fell down around me, I'd cry tears of joy!  I just wouldn't give a FUCK.

AAAAAANNNNDDDDD... to top it all off... E has an epic cold!  She is, as M lovingly put it, our little germ bomb.

Luckily, M, H nor I seem to have lice.  The pharmacist told me that since H has so little hair, that if she got lice, the best thing for her, treatment-wise, would be to shave her head.  I nearly burst into tears on the spot!

Yesterday, after we were able to "call it a day" all I wanted to know was if it was possible to shoot myself in the head without dying.  My migraine was epic, my stress was palpable, and my limit had been reached.  I wasn't sure I'd had a limit; yesterday I found out that I did.

Where I found this hilarious Sims pic