My sister and my mum fought day and night. I remember standing there every time, tears streaming down my face yelling "STOP IT!" to them, although it was mostly directed at T, because my mum was merely defending herself. T was out of control. At 12 years old, she would stay out all hours of the night, date older men (I'm talking in their 20s), drink, smoke and likely do drugs (although she never admits that she's done drugs). A few times my mum and sister had knock down, drag out fights. One time my sister pulled a knife on my mum. I, a scared 9 year old, cowered in the corner and called 911. T took off before the police arrived. But they took my statement, my mum's statement. I imagine that they even took photos of the scratches and cuts that T inflicted on mum.
Finally, at 13 years old, my mum turned T over to the Children's Aid Society. Mum couldn't handle T anymore, and my childhood was being tragically lost. T was sent to a group home. I remember visiting her a couple of times there. It was scary. T loved it. She loved the freedom; so much so that she got pregnant at 14 years old. Her and her boyfriend (another group home child) used to have sex in the parking garage down the street. Klassy. T gave birth to her first child a week before her 15th birthday. I believe that T had the baby taken away from her about 6 months later. The baby was adopted by a family, who I hope are loving and kind and have provided the baby a safe home for the past 20 years.
A few months after that T moved to the west coast. At 17 she got pregnant with twins, but aborted them. At 18 she got pregnant again. She had this baby, a girl. She is the only one I have contact with. She's a gorgeous, lovely teenager now.
T began a relationship with another man, a very nice man, in her mid 20s. She had a baby by him as well. That baby, a girl is now 9 years old. T does not have custody of the teenager or the child. Both live with their dads. She only is in contact with the teen.
About 4 years ago, T began a relationship with a foreign man, who lived in her city. He treated her like shit. He'd never met me and chewed me out for not flying my sister out for my destination wedding. Why would I fly my sister to my wedding when I didn't have a relationship with her. She's only my sister because we share the same DNA. Anyway, she got pregnant by this lovely man. The baby, a boy, was taken from them at 9 months old and put into foster care. I will expand on this in another post.
My sister has never had a job. Went to school until grade 7. She claims to have her GED. When I was in college, I sacrificed what little money I had to give her kids Christmas one year. I bought her a vacuum one year, even though I needed one. I've offered countless hours of help, advice, etc. I've given her money, charity and love. She's given me nothing. She's just taken advantage of me. I go back and forth in between needing to save her or not. She is un-save-able.
Up until last week, she was living in a homeless shelter for 4 months. She was living with the foreign boyfriend and his mom, until the mom kicked T out. She has crohns disease which is a severe case for her, but not enough to stop her from working at every job that has ever existed. She's always been on welfare or disability. She is a drain on society and refuses to be anything but.
I've never longed for a sister. I've never missed her. I've never needed her.
Right now, she really needs me...
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